IC Inbox III

[ukan]

This is Lark, leave a message.

Comments

[citizendetective]

Well, I think it's really silly to act like it's the same as, you know, real death, but...

[Automatically, one hand starts to drift over to her stomach. She forces it back down to her side, then turns to keep walking through the trees.]

That doesn't mean it's not horrifying. You talk about it like it's nothing, but you're wrong.

[ukan]

No, I hate how people treat death like it doesn't matter here. It matters in completely different ways than at home, sure; but nothing fucked me up worse than having to relearn why I shouldn't kill people at home once I graduated.

[citizendetective]

Well, that's silly, too.

[She says bluntly, shrugging.]

No offense! But home is so different from here. I'm assuming yours is, too.

[ukan]

[Dry] People die permanently from fentanyl overdoses in my world, too.

[citizendetective]

Right! Right. So if things are so different at home, you shouldn't have had to learn that killing people there wouldn't be exactly the same as killing people here.

[ukan]

I wasn't a person who needed to stop thinking of death as important, permanent or not. But I did after a few years here; it was downhill from there.

[citizendetective]

But you graduated anyway, right?

For the record, I don't think death isn't important.

[ukan]

Is that because death is a handy tool? [Honest question. He just admitted he's killed people, so there's no hint of judgment either.]

[citizendetective]

It can be! It can be a solution, or...

[Another shrug.]

But it's still a big step. That woman who I kidnapped? I killed her, and I didn't do it because it was nothing or because it was fun. I did it because she might have hurt Nat, Shauna, and Tai, and anything was worth stopping that from happening.

[And, of course, she could have - probably would have - blown the whistle on what Misty had done to her, too. That had also been a part of her motive. But it's not the part of her motive that makes her heart swell with pride and satisfaction.]

[ukan]

I need you to be more creative here. We don't torture, we don't kill, we don't leverage with threats. We want the facts and we need them to be untainted by pressure.

[citizendetective]

I can do that. I can do that! I mean, the stakes are lower.

[ukan]

They're not.

We're on a ship full of people with magical, mystical powers and no moral compasses. Our stakes involve not making them worse than they already are.

[citizendetective]

No, I meant--

[Hmmmmm. Maybe she shouldn't say what she meant; that might not help her case.]

-- Okay. Sure.

[ukan]

You meant what?

[You can't leave thoughts half-finished with Lark.]

[citizendetective]

I just meant the stakes are lower for me. My team isn't here. But you know what, that's actually a good thing for your purposes, because I won't necessarily take extreme measures like that for just anyone.

[... Pagan. She thinks she would probably take extreme measures like that for Pagan. But that's it.]

[ukan]

Good.

I'll take to Pagan, see what he thinks of this being your new job. I'm sure he'll follow up with you.

[citizendetective]

I don't see why we'd need to ask Pagan's permission. I mean... you were his warden. If there's a hierarchy at play here, you're totally at the top.

[ukan]

I'm not his warden anymore, but he is yours. And I try to work with him out of mutual respect.

Besides, don't you want him to see that you're able to help by thinking outside the box?

[citizendetective]

Yes, obviously, Lark, but here's the thing - he might say no.

[ukan]

Why would he say no to you? Because he knows about the fentanyl chocolate?

[citizendetective]

Because he doesn't want me participating in investigations or interrogations or anything.

[ukan]

You understand why, though, don't you?

[citizendetective]

I don't think he thinks I'm going to poison a bunch of people with fentanyl for no reason, no. He-- I don't think he, um. Hates me, or is afraid of me, or...

[ukan]

What do you think, then?

[citizendetective]

I don't know, he hasn't said.

[This is bullshit.]