[ Kiryu answers the door almost immediately; he's wearing his usual red shirt, tucked in neatly to the grey pants, and those white shoes. There's a little dirt on the shoes for once, though; he hasn't taken the time to clean them off yet. ]
Thank you for coming, Lark-san. Can I offer you tea?
[ Beer or scotch would be for more enjoyable discussions. He needs his head completely clear for this so... tea. ]
[He's glad for the offer of tea, really. He's an alcoholic in remission, so gently turning down offers of better drinks (ones he really, really would like to have) is always a bit awkward.]
[ Kiryu will nod and lead the way into his house, and there's a place for Lark to leave his shoes though he won't make a point of it. There's a large family dining table, low to the ground for sitting on the floor, and beyond that, a kitchen. He goes to retrieve the tea pot and bring it back to the large table where the two of them can sit before pouring out for both of them. It's green tea, nothing special but decent enough, and it's obvious he knows what he's doing in the brewing at the very least.
He'll answer once the tea is served.]
Nothing I couldn't handle. But I admit that it's given me enough to examine that I thought I should speak to a more senior co-worker.
[At home Lark is an espresso fiend. Here on the Barge he has learned to savor a very good cup of tea, and this? This is good tea. So he takes a moment to enjoy the scent of it before he speaks.]
[ He looks to Lark and it's obvious that he's trying to find the place to begin. None of this is anything he'd keep secret in this place; there's no one here who can be hurt by his truths other than him and as he lived this life and made those choices, any harm that could come down on him he's prepared to handle. Instead, it's how to explain the issue. ]
I have mentioned on the network that I've spent some time in prison in my own world. Roughly fourteen years, to be more specific, in two different stints.
[ He watches Lark as he continues, though he feels he's been obvious enough. ]
But men who grow from their negative experiences are rare. Kiryu is clearly one of them; Lark can see very clearly why Kiryu isn't an inmate here though.]
I am concerned that that experience has shaped my thinking in ways that might be unhelpful as a warden in this place.
[ He lifts his cup and takes a sip, swallowing before he dips his head and continues. ]
I was contacted today by an inmate. The inmate I've been paired with had attempted to steal something from her. And I admit, [ and he's a little sheepish here ] my first impulse was to ask why this was something of note.
It's a prison. Theft happens all the time in a prison. Reporting such a thing to a warden is...
[ He clears his throat. ]
Not generally done, in my experience.
[ He takes another sip before he continues. ]
I listened to her complaint and I have since addressed it with Rags-san... but it gave me pause enough to hope that a warden of some experience, and one who has shown himself to be understanding of... certain things, might have some advice.
[Reporting to a warden isn't done; Lark smiles a bit and tips his head to indicate that's a very fair point.
He considers the situation for a moment.]
I stole things when I was an inmate. I never had anything stolen from me, but nothing was done about my theft. I don't think it was ever reported.
At home, for you and for me, prison is a punishment. It's where prisoners are kept away from more 'civilized' people, until they're so desperate to get out that they cooperate. Or, more often, they just wait out the sentence.
But this isn't a real prison. They can't leave, and it can become stifling. Maddening. Because there are no set time limits. I believe as wardens it's our job to help them mend something they lost or had broken at home, at some point in their lives. Whatever it is that makes their life into an obstacle.
Personally? I don't think theft is a big deal. But we have to teach them that their boundaries matter here, and that we'll help enforce those boundaries, or they're going to keep tearing each other apart.
[ The answer is good, useful. It's in alignment with his own beliefs in all the important places, but there is a piece that hasn't really been addressed. ]
Helping people is all I've ever tried to do in my life, Lark-san. Helping them mend something in their lives, clear up a mistake, handle a situation they couldn't solve. [ His expression turns a little darker. ] Or fight the battles they weren't strong enough to face on their own.
But I am- [ he frowns again ] I am not used to being part of an authority. Had she come to me as Kiryu, who knows Rags-san, that thought would have never occurred to me. My first thought would have been just to help her to feel safe again. Addressing it as a 'warden', however...
[ His fingers curl and uncurl around the teacup. ]
It feels like disrespect to them, like I'm treating them like children under my care. And whatever pains they hold within them, even Rags-san is not truly a child.
I think it's a mistake to view anyone here as anything but an autonomous adult.
With Pagan... [Maybe it's a bad example. He has had to treat Pagan like an unruly pup sometimes.]
It isn't about handing down an order from on high. It's about learning why they're doing what they're doing, and trying to do it together because usually they don't fully understand it, either. And then it's about meeting them where you can both understand each other, finding a better way for them to get the same result.
I agree with you, Lark-san. Though I'm not looking to find ways to assist my inmate, specifically. We have an understanding.
[ Namely that Kiryu won't try to graduate him, and Kiryu has no intention of doing anything like it. He's going to support Rags's dreams as they are, and encourage him to make the most of his new home, to better himself for himself entirely outside of what the Admiral might want for him. ]
My difficulty is in being a part of this community in a position of authority. While my intention may not involve 'handing down an order from on high', I'm not blind to the fact that the difference in our status can make the most innocuous attempt at assistance seem like such a thing.
And I can't fault them for it. Trusting systems like this is... difficult.
[ He glances at Lark. ]
You're the only warden I thought to ask about this. Mostly because I thought that, given your behavior around my time with Pagan-san, you would be most likely to understand this as well.
[He nods, and for a moment focuses again on the clean scent of the tea he holds in his hands. It clears his mind a little.]
The one thing I will say about everyone here in general is that it isn't our job to change them. The things they learned to do--Rags's stealing, my fighting--were done because they kept us alive at home. Taking that away just so they fit some ideal model here? It's cruel. It damns the inmate when they return home.
I'm here because there is no trust in the system. That's what I want to change: the system itself. We can't pretend there isn't a power imbalance between us and the inmates. I know plenty of wardens who live in a fairyland where they think that isn't true, but it is. And every inmate knows it.
What's the balance between our authority and remembering we aren't here to control them? I'm honestly still trying to figure it out, Kiryu. People say, this isn't a prison it's rehab. That's bullshit, too. We're not doctors. The only things we have to offer the inmates are our adaptive skills, and our willingness to let them use our power as well.
[He's talking a lot, which isn't really like him. So he pauses, sums up:] You have insights so few wardens do. I don't want to see you change to fit the model here; the model is chaos. I want to see you help me reshape things into something everyone can rely on, just a little bit more. You asking me for professional opinions, me being able to go to you to talk about what might help Pagan even though he's 'my inmate'...that's what we need here.
[ One thing that Lark will notice is that Kiryu is very much an active listener. He puts his all into taking in what someone says, what they're trying to say, puts his focus on absorbing the words before he starts to process them or considers a response. To some, it makes him look slow, but he finds it provides a greater understanding, a more complete one, than speaking quickly. And he's never much cared what people thought of him.
When Lark finishes, he nods. ]
I would like to help you to make this place better. And I will happily offer my perspective, and my support. I even feel comfortable sharing some of my own life experience where it may be helpful. I've done so with some of the other new wardens, and encouraged them to work together both with others new to the work and to seek guidance from more experienced co-workers.
But on the matter of Pagan-san... I do want to be clear that I will not break Pagan-san's confidence. I hope you understand.
[To an outsider this room would probably read as tense--or extremely intense, rather. The two of them watching each other, reading lines that aren't said out loud, not as a chess match but as something collaborative and therefore more risky.]
I hope you believe me when I say that, if I thought you would share things Pagan trusts you with, I wouldn't be here. I can't be his only source of input. I want him to be able to trust other people, and to know they won't sell him out. He's made a slew of bad decisions...I believe befriending you might be the first good decision he's made in a while.
[ A single nod. That's all he needed to make sure of. Pagan had very quickly become someone he cared about, and he only knows one way to care about people on a personal level and that is deeply. He's been here a month and the man is definitely in the small camp of those he'd die for without question. ]
I do. As I said: when you chose to trust him concerning our introduction, you gained a measure of my trust as well.
What you've said has given me a new perspective on my position, and on you. And [ he glances around the backyard, still as it was ] while it is not a comfortable position... that may be for the best.
[ There's lots to say about the ideas of having both power and comfort, on what one can accomplish while uncomfortable, but he feels as if he doesn't need to say them. That Lark will understand what he means. He nods again, and takes a sip of his cooling tea. The pot is still warm, though, so he'll refresh it with some from the pot. He'll offer to Lark as well as he gets to another point. Directly.]
Are you familiar with the yakuza as an institution?
[It doesn't need to be said. There are, in fact, a lot of things he senses Kiryu doesn't say but that Lark agrees with deeply. It's unusual for him to feel so easy with another person; usually he's analyzing and angling to be sure the outcome is useful to them both. With Kiryu, it's a simple flow of words and understandings.
Though the question does take him off guard. He accepts the tea before he answers.] I am. Not on a personal level; I deal mostly with American clients, and even the black hats I run across don't have the sort of organizational pull the yakuza is supposed to have. I'm intrigued.
The man who raised me was an assassin with a yakuza crime syndicate whose membership numbered in the thousands. And I swore up when I was 17 years old. When I was 20, I was involved in a power struggle which determined the clan's third chairman. And I've had a significant reputation since then.
[ The information is provided plainly, both to see what Lark wants to know, where he needs more information, whether this changes his intention to work with him... and to lay it out there for Lark to use in determining how and what and where he thinks Kiryu can provide information to help with Pagan. ]
[Lark listens with that same intensity, his respect ratcheting up a few notches. It isn't about the violence of the yakuza, which he knows Kiryu would have had to navigate against himself as well as perpetrating it on others. It's really that Kiryu came through all that so wise but so compassionate as well. People crumble under lesser circumstances.]
I hope you take it as a compliment that I can imagine the sort of reputation you'd have even here. Are you still involved with them?
[ He'll nod, and he will take it as a compliment. But he's never much concerned himself with reputation. That hasn't always been a good thing, but that's just how it is. He at least realizes that isn't as much of an option here in such a contained space and has been working on making sure his reputation is one of trustworthiness and help. ]
Technically, I haven't properly been a member since I was 27 when I was expelled.
[ Which is something he'd known would happen when he took the wrap for murdering their patriarch, took the gun from Nishiki's shaking hands. ]
And a little more than ten years ago. When I was named fourth chairman.
[ Between the lines: my life, it has been Complicated. ]
I stepped down from the position immediately but I've been intermittently involved in the clan's concerns and power struggles for the last ten years. My position as a civilian, a former chairman, but one without an official status in an organization has made my help... particularly useful.
[ More between the lines: acting outside of authority is what I'm used to. ]
I am no longer involved with them, or anything else in my world. The incident I mentioned to you before... I'm 'dead' to everyone. Only one person I know knows I'm still alive these days. And I trust him to keep that to himself.
With each sentence Lark's curiosity rises. By the end he's leaning forward just the slightest bit. It's both a fascinating story and it spells a promising path forward, a deep relief to Lark.
"I take it, then, that you've had experience working with particularly wary people." Stubborn, he means, but also badly treated. "How did those interactions go?"
"No one swears up, or lives in that world, if they have other options," Kiryu says mildly, which is very much an answer. His world is one of people too stubborn to die or be forgotten, who've almost always been warped or pushed by their circumstances to become what they are. Sometimes for good, far too often not.
"And I've found that it takes patience, listening both to what someone says and what they do not say. The strength to challenge their cynicism and to weather the wounds that come from that fight. The willingness to help someone pursue their dreams over anyone else's idea of who and what they should become... including yourself."
He wants a cigarette, suddenly, intensely. But the man had said he was a wolf. He won't be rude. Instead, he sips his tea.
"It's too easy to remember the failures. But there must be some reason people kept asking me to help."
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I always prefer to speak in person, Lark-san. But I understand if you were winding down for the night. I didn't mean to disturb your evening.
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I'll meet you in five?
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If you wouldn't mind coming to my cabin again as this is something I would prefer to speak on privately.
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[He arrives right around five minutes later, in fact, and knocks.]
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Thank you for coming, Lark-san. Can I offer you tea?
[ Beer or scotch would be for more enjoyable discussions. He needs his head completely clear for this so... tea. ]
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[He's glad for the offer of tea, really. He's an alcoholic in remission, so gently turning down offers of better drinks (ones he really, really would like to have) is always a bit awkward.]
I take it your week isn't going smoothly?
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He'll answer once the tea is served.]
Nothing I couldn't handle. But I admit that it's given me enough to examine that I thought I should speak to a more senior co-worker.
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I'm happy to help however I can. Fill me in?
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I have mentioned on the network that I've spent some time in prison in my own world. Roughly fourteen years, to be more specific, in two different stints.
[ He watches Lark as he continues, though he feels he's been obvious enough. ]
As an inmate. Not as a warden.
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But men who grow from their negative experiences are rare. Kiryu is clearly one of them; Lark can see very clearly why Kiryu isn't an inmate here though.]
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[ He lifts his cup and takes a sip, swallowing before he dips his head and continues. ]
I was contacted today by an inmate. The inmate I've been paired with had attempted to steal something from her. And I admit, [ and he's a little sheepish here ] my first impulse was to ask why this was something of note.
It's a prison. Theft happens all the time in a prison. Reporting such a thing to a warden is...
[ He clears his throat. ]
Not generally done, in my experience.
[ He takes another sip before he continues. ]
I listened to her complaint and I have since addressed it with Rags-san... but it gave me pause enough to hope that a warden of some experience, and one who has shown himself to be understanding of... certain things, might have some advice.
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He considers the situation for a moment.]
I stole things when I was an inmate. I never had anything stolen from me, but nothing was done about my theft. I don't think it was ever reported.
At home, for you and for me, prison is a punishment. It's where prisoners are kept away from more 'civilized' people, until they're so desperate to get out that they cooperate. Or, more often, they just wait out the sentence.
But this isn't a real prison. They can't leave, and it can become stifling. Maddening. Because there are no set time limits. I believe as wardens it's our job to help them mend something they lost or had broken at home, at some point in their lives. Whatever it is that makes their life into an obstacle.
Personally? I don't think theft is a big deal. But we have to teach them that their boundaries matter here, and that we'll help enforce those boundaries, or they're going to keep tearing each other apart.
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Helping people is all I've ever tried to do in my life, Lark-san. Helping them mend something in their lives, clear up a mistake, handle a situation they couldn't solve. [ His expression turns a little darker. ] Or fight the battles they weren't strong enough to face on their own.
But I am- [ he frowns again ] I am not used to being part of an authority. Had she come to me as Kiryu, who knows Rags-san, that thought would have never occurred to me. My first thought would have been just to help her to feel safe again. Addressing it as a 'warden', however...
[ His fingers curl and uncurl around the teacup. ]
It feels like disrespect to them, like I'm treating them like children under my care. And whatever pains they hold within them, even Rags-san is not truly a child.
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With Pagan... [Maybe it's a bad example. He has had to treat Pagan like an unruly pup sometimes.]
It isn't about handing down an order from on high. It's about learning why they're doing what they're doing, and trying to do it together because usually they don't fully understand it, either. And then it's about meeting them where you can both understand each other, finding a better way for them to get the same result.
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[ Namely that Kiryu won't try to graduate him, and Kiryu has no intention of doing anything like it. He's going to support Rags's dreams as they are, and encourage him to make the most of his new home, to better himself for himself entirely outside of what the Admiral might want for him. ]
My difficulty is in being a part of this community in a position of authority. While my intention may not involve 'handing down an order from on high', I'm not blind to the fact that the difference in our status can make the most innocuous attempt at assistance seem like such a thing.
And I can't fault them for it. Trusting systems like this is... difficult.
[ He glances at Lark. ]
You're the only warden I thought to ask about this. Mostly because I thought that, given your behavior around my time with Pagan-san, you would be most likely to understand this as well.
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The one thing I will say about everyone here in general is that it isn't our job to change them. The things they learned to do--Rags's stealing, my fighting--were done because they kept us alive at home. Taking that away just so they fit some ideal model here? It's cruel. It damns the inmate when they return home.
I'm here because there is no trust in the system. That's what I want to change: the system itself. We can't pretend there isn't a power imbalance between us and the inmates. I know plenty of wardens who live in a fairyland where they think that isn't true, but it is. And every inmate knows it.
What's the balance between our authority and remembering we aren't here to control them? I'm honestly still trying to figure it out, Kiryu. People say, this isn't a prison it's rehab. That's bullshit, too. We're not doctors. The only things we have to offer the inmates are our adaptive skills, and our willingness to let them use our power as well.
[He's talking a lot, which isn't really like him. So he pauses, sums up:] You have insights so few wardens do. I don't want to see you change to fit the model here; the model is chaos. I want to see you help me reshape things into something everyone can rely on, just a little bit more. You asking me for professional opinions, me being able to go to you to talk about what might help Pagan even though he's 'my inmate'...that's what we need here.
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When Lark finishes, he nods. ]
I would like to help you to make this place better. And I will happily offer my perspective, and my support. I even feel comfortable sharing some of my own life experience where it may be helpful. I've done so with some of the other new wardens, and encouraged them to work together both with others new to the work and to seek guidance from more experienced co-workers.
But on the matter of Pagan-san... I do want to be clear that I will not break Pagan-san's confidence. I hope you understand.
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I hope you believe me when I say that, if I thought you would share things Pagan trusts you with, I wouldn't be here. I can't be his only source of input. I want him to be able to trust other people, and to know they won't sell him out. He's made a slew of bad decisions...I believe befriending you might be the first good decision he's made in a while.
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I do. As I said: when you chose to trust him concerning our introduction, you gained a measure of my trust as well.
What you've said has given me a new perspective on my position, and on you. And [ he glances around the backyard, still as it was ] while it is not a comfortable position... that may be for the best.
[ There's lots to say about the ideas of having both power and comfort, on what one can accomplish while uncomfortable, but he feels as if he doesn't need to say them. That Lark will understand what he means. He nods again, and takes a sip of his cooling tea. The pot is still warm, though, so he'll refresh it with some from the pot. He'll offer to Lark as well as he gets to another point. Directly.]
Are you familiar with the yakuza as an institution?
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Though the question does take him off guard. He accepts the tea before he answers.] I am. Not on a personal level; I deal mostly with American clients, and even the black hats I run across don't have the sort of organizational pull the yakuza is supposed to have. I'm intrigued.
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[ The information is provided plainly, both to see what Lark wants to know, where he needs more information, whether this changes his intention to work with him... and to lay it out there for Lark to use in determining how and what and where he thinks Kiryu can provide information to help with Pagan. ]
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I hope you take it as a compliment that I can imagine the sort of reputation you'd have even here. Are you still involved with them?
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Technically, I haven't properly been a member since I was 27 when I was expelled.
[ Which is something he'd known would happen when he took the wrap for murdering their patriarch, took the gun from Nishiki's shaking hands. ]
And a little more than ten years ago. When I was named fourth chairman.
[ Between the lines: my life, it has been Complicated. ]
I stepped down from the position immediately but I've been intermittently involved in the clan's concerns and power struggles for the last ten years. My position as a civilian, a former chairman, but one without an official status in an organization has made my help... particularly useful.
[ More between the lines: acting outside of authority is what I'm used to. ]
I am no longer involved with them, or anything else in my world. The incident I mentioned to you before... I'm 'dead' to everyone. Only one person I know knows I'm still alive these days. And I trust him to keep that to himself.
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"I take it, then, that you've had experience working with particularly wary people." Stubborn, he means, but also badly treated. "How did those interactions go?"
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"And I've found that it takes patience, listening both to what someone says and what they do not say. The strength to challenge their cynicism and to weather the wounds that come from that fight. The willingness to help someone pursue their dreams over anyone else's idea of who and what they should become... including yourself."
He wants a cigarette, suddenly, intensely. But the man had said he was a wolf. He won't be rude. Instead, he sips his tea.
"It's too easy to remember the failures. But there must be some reason people kept asking me to help."
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