You're not in a good place. Something's throwing you.
But even if it isn't easy, you're accepting help. You're working against your fear. And your anger. And you're listening. You're doing... all that? While minimizing the damage you're doing to others. You're looking forward, even if you're having trouble seeing right now. You're looking in, even if it seems like a jumbled up mess.
And you're not taking it out on anyone else beyond, potentially? Some questionable decisions. And you don't feel entitled to this being fixed. You know it needs to be.
Graduating... doesn't mean that you've solved all your problems. Not here. Not inside. Not back home. It means you're back in the race. That's all.
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no subject
All right.
[ He considers just answering the question. ]
I don’t agree. That you lack a conscience. But… I agree… you might have turned yours off. Gone into survival mode.
[ A longer, slower breath.]
And I understand. Why that line is hard for you. Since it was probably drawn out, so long, so thin? You can barely see it.
But.
The difference. Between an inmate and a warden. Is in what you’re doing right now.
no subject
no subject
But even if it isn't easy, you're accepting help. You're working against your fear. And your anger. And you're listening. You're doing... all that? While minimizing the damage you're doing to others. You're looking forward, even if you're having trouble seeing right now. You're looking in, even if it seems like a jumbled up mess.
And you're not taking it out on anyone else beyond, potentially? Some questionable decisions. And you don't feel entitled to this being fixed. You know it needs to be.
Graduating... doesn't mean that you've solved all your problems. Not here. Not inside. Not back home. It means you're back in the race. That's all.
[ A deep sigh. ]
I wish... I could come see you right now.
But with everything going on?
...Cutter is not what you need right now.
no subject
I don't know. Cutter might be exactly what I need.
no subject
He'd take the broken glass that's in your gut right now? And figure out how to twist. Every. Single. Piece.
It's what he's good at.
I would know.
[ Not to be distracted- ]
But as soon as this is over? You'll be sick of me. [ He grins. ] Because you're not doing this journey? Alone. I'm here. For the long haul.
Even when you're being an asshole about it.
Iris would tell you the same.